For some reason, I’m lost for words…

“I have nothing to say…” was the only thing that came to mind.

I looked outside my office window and that’s when I knew I had to pause and take a break.

I closed my laptop and let out a big heavy sigh.

I have been writing all day. I’ve always wanted to do this. I’ve always wanted to create contents and write for a living. I’ve always wanted to inspire through writing. But for the past 48 hours, it had been a roller coaster ride of thoughts and feelings.

I’ve got so many ideas in my head. Yet for some reason, I’m lost for words…

I can’t seem to get them out of my head. Suddenly, I find it hard to express them. I know the words to say, I just don’t know how to.

For the past few days, I was on fast track. I was unstoppable. Things seem to be taking their place right in front of my eyes. I became too excited with the unexpected and special opportunities happening around me. I got caught up with the magic of being in the moment.

This afternoon got me thinking… I have to refocus. Lucky for me, I could watch the beautiful sunset every day from my office window. It was remarkably beautiful. Gorgeous. I watched it unfold right before me as the color of the sky slowly changed and transitioned from one dramatic hue to another.

I pressed the power on button and started typing the words again. Slowly and carefully this time – just letting them out. Writing, deleting, writing and deleting again.

No rush.

Just when I thought inspiration was nowhere in sight, I realized it was right in front of me.

All I need is to slow down….

TGIT! Thank God it’s Thursday!

TGIT! Thank God it’s Thursday! 🙂

In Dubai, Thursday is the last day of the work week. Obviously, it’s the new Friday for me.

But I decided to stay in tonight. Well, let me rephrase that… I chose to stay in tonight. To be honest, I have been excited with the thought of just being able to reach home, take off my heels and wear my favourite pajamas. I don’t have to wake up early tomorrow. Such a happy thought!

So I’m home on a Thursday night huh? What happened to partying over the weekend? I must admit, I’m not a big fan of drunken nights and partying ‘till dawn anymore. Yes, I guess it comes with age.  Likewise, if you’re 29 and single, expect people close to you to ask the same magic question, “Don’t you have a date?” Not for tonight. Not for now.

Let’s just say I’m on a break – a much needed break. 😉

Back to how my Thursday is going so far. So tonight is all about mastering the skill of multitasking.

The plan is to cook a tuna pesto pasta for dinner and do my laundry while writing this post. I’m doing pretty good considering I’ve written almost half of this article while waiting for the pasta to cook and the washer to finish my laundry. Don’t worry, timer for both is set. 😉

Tonight is one of those nights when I appreciate the simple joys of living independently. I was on my way out of the office building when I suddenly craved for pesto pasta so I dropped by Spinney’s after work and bought the ingredients for it. Spontaneous moments like that make me feel free – free to do whatever I want to do, whenever & wherever I want to.

I did an hour work-out upon reaching home. I know it will defeat the purpose because I’m about to devour at least two plates of pesto anytime soon but hey it’s the weekend. 😉 Hold on!  The timer for pasta and washer has just alarmed. At the same time?!? Now, my multi-tasking skill is really being put to test.

After almost 30 minutes:

I’m ready to eat! My tuna pesto pasta looks good. Well, I should appreciate my own masterpiece or no one else will. It’s not that bad. Oh the first few bites?!? Best feeling ever! Haha 🙂 I’m exaggerating… Well, it’s a mix of genuine happiness that my “special dinner” tonight tastes pretty decent and that sense of pleasure after my craving has been satisfied. I’ve cooked a lot of pasta though and the pesto sauce isn’t enough so I’ll just put it in the fridge for tomorrow.

Tuna Pesto Pasta with Chicken Strips ala Jess 😉

It’s past 11. Dinner’s done. Laundry’s done. I’ve washed the dishes and have done a bit of house cleaning. To be honest, I’m not really good at multi-tasking. I have to do things one at a time in order to maintain focus. That’s the problem with me. I tend to pay attention to almost everything all at the same time. That’s what I’m trying to work on lately.

Anyway, it’s getting late. I’m sitting in my bed now wearing my favorite pajamas, legs crossed while writing this post. Surprisingly, it feels good. (Such an oldie huh? Yeah, welcome me to the club please) 🙂

Sometimes, we need a break from it all. Every day can be really overwhelming. We all have so much going on in our lives – things we want and need to do. It doesn’t hurt to spend time with yourself.. on a Thursday night like this.

Goodnight world!

My Coffee Has Gone Cold

“You’re off to great places! Today is your day! Your mountain is waiting so.. Get on your way! – Dr Seuss

I arrived in the office 30 minutes past eight today – pretty late than usual. I still arrived ahead of anyone else anyway.  I did my normal routine – turned on my computer, checked my emails and decided to have my morning coffee…

While waiting for the water to boil in the kettle, I looked outside the window of the office, taking in the view of Jumeirah Island and the clusters of skyscrapers in Jumeirah Lake Towers. It was quite a sight to behold especially on a day like this…

 8:30 am morning view

Lost in my thoughts, I heard the pleasant ping from the kettle. I simply fill my cup with water and made my first coffee for the day. Ah, the smell! It’s almost more than enough to lift up my soul. I went back to that same spot beside the window and watched the morning rush outside. Everything seemed scripted – the driver finding a spot in the parking lot, the British men in suits crossing the street in front of Bonnington Hotel and even the sight of the fast metro in motion from afar.

I came across a post from one of my favorite blogger Patty Laurel a couple of days ago where she talked about the irony of “good-bad” days in life. It was so timely. I have been having more and more of these “good-bad” days lately – where you feel like riding in a roller coaster of happy and sad state of being. That kind of day when you wake up feeling “oh it will be a great day today!” and then suddenly you find yourself staring outside the window of your office, not noticing that your coffee has gone cold. Oh yes, I forgot about my coffee! I didn’t realize how long I’ve been staring outside the window. 5? 10 minutes? And then my colleagues started coming in…

I reheated my cup of coffee and settled myself in front of my computer. I stared at the blinking cursor and started to write. Type, delete..type again, delete again. Today was definitely one of those days, I told myself. I was writing an interview piece for one of our clients and I couldn’t even think of a synonym for the word “transcend”. I had already been rewriting answers to each question for almost an hour until I remembered that I haven’t drank my coffee and it had gone cold again!

Should I still drink it? I had to! So, I reheated it one more time. I decided to stop what I was doing. Once is enough, twice is too much. So this time, I sat down and took the time to drink my coffee. I neither look outside the window nor started thinking of synonyms and what not – I simply sat there and finished it. Surprisingly, it made me feel a bit better…

In life, it’s so easy to get caught up with all the stuff that’s going on around us. It’s so overwhelming! One moment, you feel extremely positive. But just when you thought that the universe is finally at your side, something bad happens that make you ask “Why is this happening to me?”.. When we feel happy, we feel like it will never end but when we feel sad, we have lots of regrets. Isn’t that so true? Life abroad is not perfect and it doesn’t have to. Saying “I’m living or working abroad” sounds like music to the ear but in reality, it can get out of tune at times too. While it’s true that you should try your best to make the most out of it, hard times are inevitable. It’s okay if things aren’t going exactly as you wish it to be. You can do something about it! (Thinking out loud here..) Easier said than done but you have to confront it, you got to do what you got to do.

I’m not sure how many more “good-bad” days are coming my way. If all I have to do is close my eyes and wish for good days ahead, I wouldn’t waste a single second to do so. But life isn’t made that way. Without bad days, how would we be able to know what a good day is like? Repeat after me: “Oh well, tomorrow is another day!”

Today had been just another of those “good-bad” days that I’m glad had passed – one that made me stop and ponder after my coffee has gone cold.

6:30 pm night time view from the 32nd floor